I was recently looking at the stock market. Most people were panicking because the numbers were red, but I found myself getting frustrated when it went up. Why? Because on the days it goes up, I cannot invest effectively. It is a simple shift in perspective, but it reveals a fundamental truth about human performance: most people are focused on the wrong side of the equation.

If you sit down today to write out your objectives and they start with the word “get” (as in get a promotion, get a championship ring, or get a million dollars), you are already on a roller coaster you cannot control.

You are betting your happiness on a result. And in my experience coaching everyone from C-level executives to NBA players, a result-oriented approach is the fastest way to underperform.

The Trap of “Get”

When your goal is to “get” something, you are placing your power in the hands of the universe, the referees, or your boss. You are essentially saying, “I will be content if and when these external factors align”.

This creates what I call “tightness”.

Think about a golfer on the tee. If his goal is to get the ball 300 yards down the fairway to impress his friends, he tightens up. He is looking for instant gratification. But all elite performance comes out of how loose you are. The moment you obsess over the “get,” you lose the fluidity required to actually perform the task.

Perfectionism is the cousin of the “get” mindset. It promises you riches at the end of the rainbow, but it only delivers pain because perfection does not exist. I have seen pro receivers call a game “horrible” after catching only one pass. They completely ignored the fact that they ran excellent routes and hit every blocking assignment. They were so focused on what they did not get (the stats) that they missed the fact that their process was elite.

The “Become” Framework

The unlock is shifting your vocabulary from “get” to “become” or “do”. You do not want to get a championship; you want to become the type of player who is prepared to win one.

• Build the Foundation: If your car is tuned up and full of gas, you are ready to drive to the store or Vegas at a moment’s notice.

• The Ulysses Contract: Do not wait until you are in a high-stress situation to decide how to act. Make a deal with yourself now. Decide that your process (whether it is making your bed, your morning “TEA Forms,” or your workout) is non-negotiable.

• Flush the Slumps: Expect “rough days”. I tell athletes to expect 20 bad practices a season. When one happens, celebrate it. You are one step closer to finishing the “math of progress” for that year.

Trusting the Serendipity

There is no straight line to success. When you focus on building yourself rather than chasing outside “accouterments,” the opportunities start to show up in front of you. I call it serendipity.

One of my clients (a professional athlete) was told he needed surgery on a torn rotator cuff and would miss the season. Instead of obsessing over the “get” (a healthy shoulder through surgery), he followed a different process: Prolotherapy. He was back on the field before the season ended. He did not accept the “standard” result; he stayed inquisitive and focused on a different route.

Your Immediate Mental Tool: The Goal Audit

Take a look at your current to-do list or your goals for 2026.

1. Identify every “Get” goal. (Example: “Get 10 new clients.”
2. Rewrite it as a “Process” goal. (Example: “I will reach out to 5 prospects every morning before 10:00 AM.”)
3. Attach it to an existing habit. If you already brush your teeth, attach your new process goal to that moment.

When you focus on the process, you provide yourself with a stable foundation. Results orientation is a roller coaster; process is a path.

Stop worrying about the destination and build a better driver.

You can follow Sam on Twitter: @SuperTaoInc

Posted in The Mind Side Blog